4 Steps to Overcome Self-Doubt while Decluttering

When I started out on my minimalist journey three years ago, I quickly became a “how-to-declutter-your-home” junkie.

I read blog posts, scoured books, enrolled in courses, and listened to podcasts. Determined to live simply with much less stuff, I was a sponge, soaking up an abundance of tips from those who had this “minimalism thing” figured out. 

A few months into minimalism I could tell you almost every decluttering method. And while we had reversed our possession flow—more stuff was exiting our home than entering—the process still felt a bit stagnant. 

What I wanted to be a cascade-like exodus of possessions from our home felt more like a trickle.

I couldn’t figure out why. 

Until I realized something.

The problem wasn’t in my decluttering method. It was in me. More specifically, it was in my mindset. 

I had the knowledge, but I hadn’t really bought into the idea that I could actually live this way. Minimalism was a radical lifestyle shift, after all. And even though I so desired this lifestyle, many of my self-talk thoughts went like this:

I don’t have time to take on this huge project of decluttering my home right now. 

We can’t declutter kid’s toys—won’t they feel deprived with less stuff?

I can’t declutter with kids at home. 

My brain was full of reasons why pursuing minimalism wouldn’t work. I now know my self-doubt was normal—it was even to be expected.

Shira Gill says in her book Minimalista, “As soon as you set a big goal, your brain will almost inevitably start to have a tantrum. It will tell you your goal is too hard or complicated or that you will fail. Your brain is just doing its job. It wants to keep you safe, and anything new will feel like danger to the primitive part of your brain.” 

So how do you keep yourself from getting stuck in the self-doubt cycle, eventually becoming your own biggest obstacle to your decluttering goals? 

Here are 4 steps to overcome self-doubt while decluttering 

1. List all the obstacles and challenges your brain anticipates

We have over 50,000 self-talk thoughts a day and 80% of them are negative. Before diving into the decluttering process, pause and tune into your self-talk. Realize that your brain will look for ways to dissuade you. But you have the choice to listen

Gill recommends writing down all the obstacles that your brain anticipates. List out every challenge that comes to mind. 

I can’t move furniture by myself.

My family isn’t on board with decluttering so maybe I shouldn’t be either. 

I’m a messy person. This will never work for me. 

I can’t really change my spending habits and keep my home clutter-free.

Don’t judge your thoughts, whatever they may be—just put them on paper. 

2. Come up with counter arguments

Our brains are wired to find evidence that supports our thoughts. Gill says, “If we spend a lot of time thinking about what isn’t working in our lives, our brain will hunt for all sorts of evidence to back up the negative thoughts.” The same goes for positive thoughts. If we focus on what we DO want instead of our preconceived challenges, then our brains will begin finding evidence to support our new positive thoughts. 

To shift your focus away from the negative, Gill recommends examining each obstacle that your brain came up with and countering it with an argument. Pretend you’re on the debate team, she says, and have some fun with it. Your list could look like this:

Challenge: My family isn’t on board with decluttering so maybe I shouldn’t be either. Solution: I will focus on decluttering my own stuff first. I can model the benefits of minimalism to my family.

Challenge: I’m a messy person. This will never work for me. Solution: Living with less stuff will help me keep our home organized. This will work for me.

Challenge: We can’t declutter kid’s toys—won’t they feel deprived with less stuff? Solution: Research shows kids play more creatively and deeply with fewer toys.

When you counter a potential roadblock, you take away its power over you. This will make the decluttering process much more efficient.  

3. Banish hope from your vocabulary

After you’ve countered challenging thoughts with solutions, begin listening to yourself when you talk about your decluttering project. Do you hope you can declutter your home or do you believe that you can?

Gill suggests banishing the word hope from your vocabulary.  “Don’t hope you will meet your goal; believe that you will meet it,” Gill says. “Commit to making it happen. Think about the result you want. Visualize it. Write it down. Start talking as if it is inevitable.”

Speaking our goals into existence is a powerful process. Before you start (or re-start) decluttering, believe that you can create the living space you desire.

4. Ask better questions

After working through steps 1-3, you’ll feel motivated and energized to begin (or to continue) your decluttering journey. If you feel self-doubt creeping in again during the decluttering process, Gill suggests asking some of the following questions:

What do you need to start doing to get the results you want?
What do you need to stop doing to get the results you want?
What would you have to think and believe to get the results you want?
What would make success inevitable? 
What can you do RIGHT NOW to get closer to the results you want?
What would this look like if it were easy/fun/simple?

“Ask better questions,” Gill says, “and you get better answers.” These answers will lift you out of feeling stuck or blocked and propel you toward accomplishing your decluttering goals.

When it comes to decluttering your home, achieving your end result often is more dependent on your mindset than your technique. Even the most knowledgeable declutterer will fall short when stuck in self-doubt.

If you’re feeling stuck or blocked on your decluttering journey, I encourage you to work through the four steps above to regain momentum. 

You deserve to live in a home you feel good in.

Believe in yourself and make it happen.

For more guidance on how to maximize your mindset before decluttering, and for detailed tips on how to declutter your home, I highly recommend checking out Gill’s book Minimalista.

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Julia Ubbenga is a freelance journalist whose teachings on minimalism, simplicity, and intentional living have reached thousands of people worldwide through her blog. Julia practices what she preaches in her Kansas City home with her husband, two extremely lively young daughters, and one-year-old son. You can also find her on Instagram.

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I want to help you design a simple, intentional life! I’ve created a 30-day course that will guide and inspire you to make actual change in your life by decluttering your home, heart and schedule. It’s time to live focused on what matters! Learn more HERE.

One Reply to “4 Steps to Overcome Self-Doubt while Decluttering”

  1. This is a great post Julia. I really think these tips are important to overcome obstacles we create to Declutter. We have to stop believing we can’t do it and start seeing ourselves as the kind of people who live a simple life in order to stick to decluttering and achieve our desired result. I think it’s also important to speak out our fears about losing an item and then we can hear how ridiculous they actually are and counter them with logic as you mentioned. I’ve let go of a lot of stuff and I can’t even remember what most of it was!

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